A Token of Us
by Abori Chan
Summary: A certain priestess mulls over her life and fate. Will she get back her old life? Will she be able to solve her purpose? These are the questions that plague her. What happens when she crosses paths with her love? The Goshinboku housed many of their memories. Will it accept this one too? One-Shot


**DISCLAIMER:** _I don't own Inuyasha. It's the property of Rumiko Takahashi. _

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Bright sunshine pierced through the dense canopy of trees. They lit up the forest in patches, spotlighting the ground in odd areas. A pair of straw sandals crushed their way through. A couple of sparrows winged out of the tall ferns that thrived in patches, startled by the approach of a human. The figure made its way toward the self-same spot. It stood unchanged through the years. The tall tree welcomed the visitor with a wave of its branches and rained its dead leaves on the figure. The priestess caught hold of one of the leaves that brushed her face and studied it. Wrinkled and old…but unchanged, that was how the leaf was. The priestess ran her nimble fingers over her own face feeling its smoothness. If she were affected by age…her skin may have assumed the condition of the leaf. She would have been an old, gray haired wrinkled woman by now. But it was not to be. Destiny had taken a different turn for her. She was revived, to walk on the path of carnage and war. She lived for it. She had to recover her keepsake and banish the scoundrel who had brought this destruction upon her. Only then could she die in peace. It may seem like a violent act of vengeance to a common man but to her…it was her life source.

Kikyou knew that even if she destroyed Naraku with the Shikon no Tama she could never claim back one thing. Her past life. Not the one in which she fought and vanquished demons with her spiritual power but the one filled with promises and dreams. Dreams of living like a normal human, devoid of any powers. It may seem strange, but to the one who has had enough of power, who has witnessed the ruin caused by it, who has held power in her hands like a plaything, who knew of its limitations and weak links will absolutely love and cherish an ordinary life filled with small, everyday worries. And of course…she would have given anything to be back with _him_.

'_Inuyasha'_ She thought running her fingertips carefully over the scar on the tree.

She had sealed him here a long time ago. That time she was not aware of Naraku's existence. When she did not realize the filthy game he played. She had in a fit of rage and betrayal shot an arrow at Inuyasha, silencing him, putting him into a deep slumber from which he could never wake. But was it just betrayal that triggered her actions? Or was it her pride and ego of having someone break through her hard facade and making her think of abandoning her sacred duty? Maybe it was a little of both. True she was a proud priestess, conceited by her accomplishments and healing power but she had feelings. Kikyou had loved him truly. She believed his words when her accepted her suggestion of being turned into a human. She was elated when her awkwardly proposed her. She dreamed of starting a family with him. And that was where she went wrong. Because Naraku, consumed by jealousy and hate tore them apart. He used their insecurity, his of never fitting in and trusting people and hers of living a normal life and falling in love. But Kikyou alone knew that this was not so. She alone knew the secret of the jewel. The one which occurred to her the moment she had released the arrow on Inuyasha. By then it had been too late.

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Kikyou looked at the Goshinboku and sighed. She settled herself on one of its roots and continued her musings in its generous shade. She was tired of the sun and her feet were aching badly. She rested her bow and quiver against its trunk and rested her head on its bark. The dazzling blue sky hurt her eyes so she closed them. _'The Shikon no Tama is my true enemy.'_ She told herself. The jewel was corrupt to the very core. It recognized the niche in ones emotions and manipulated them. It strung people onto its fate and reinforced itself on other people's suffering and despair. That was how the jewel survived. That was why she had asked Kaede to burn the jewel along with her body. If the jewel did not exist, it would not cause harm. But she was reincarnated as Kagome and the jewel was back in its own place. It caused even more disaster when it shattered into smithereens because now every shard of the jewel could continue its evil and manipulate humans. Naraku, who desired the jewel for its power was just a fool. He hungered for dominance and gave in to the jewels wishes. The jewel controlled him. Moreover, Kikyou pitied Naraku for his foolish desires. The desire of elevated power, the desire to be the best and of course…his desire to possess her. She had been disgusted by his mentality but she soon realized that he would help rather than hinder her plans. Naraku would try to bring out the jewels malice. Once he collected all the shards…the jewel would be whole and she could purify the jewel as well as rid Naraku of his miserable existence. Once the jewel was destroyed, Midoriko's soul would be set free. And so would hers. She would finally stop living in this borrowed shell and attain her peace. _'But what about…Inuyasha?' _Her mind echoed. She tried to evade the question but her mind latched itself onto it.

Inuyasha could not be hers now. That was final. She had barred all her feelings towards him. She punished herself and made herself cold and lifeless. Because she knew…if she faltered now…if she conveyed her emotions toward him…the jewel would pounce and manipulate them again. History would repeat itself again. She would not allow herself to fail. Not after having endured and come so far. But under some circumstances…she could not help it. Inuyasha was drawn to her. If he was aware of her presence he would come uninvited, enquire of her, tell her to stop fighting. _'I will fight for you!'_ Inuyasha declared solicitously. She laughed at this. She had given up her trust in all, ages ago. Plus she needed no man to wage a war for her. She was capable enough to follow through her plans. After all Inuyasha would never realize her intentions. He appeared like a sobbing child when she took a chunk of the jewel from her reincarnation and handed it to Naraku. To him it appeared as though she supported his opponent. His dim witted friends turned up their noses whenever she came into contact with Inuyasha. They glared at her as though she alone was responsible for their troubles. More specifically, Kagome's troubles. But Kikyou never bothered about such ideas. She was perceptive enough about Kagome's simple desires. Kagome wanted Inuyasha's attention. She wanted him to adore her alone. So Kikyou had enough reasons to stay out of his way.

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Kikyou opened her eyes to look up at the sky. A small cloud passed over the sun making her vision better. The breeze picked up and her soul collectors hovered above her. She knew she should be leaving but she wanted to remain here longer. This place always made her sentimental. The truth would not lie underground for long. She loved Inuyasha. Yes. Initially she hated to see Kagome with him. Flames of jealousy would rage in her heart. She was jealous of her reincarnations hassle free life, her easily inherited powers for which she need not labour, keeping herself spiritually clean and practice tirelessly and above all live like an ordinary woman. But Kikyou knew she was rather stupid. Inuyasha would never forget her. Her memory would haunt him and he would never allow any other woman to have a place in his heart. And that was enough for Kikyou. She did not mind in the least to be preserved in his heart as a bad, guilt ridden memory. It was a selfish and vain desire but when you led a life like Kikyou's there is no harm in being a little self-centered. However, it still pained her to see Inuyasha with Kagome. Kagome had seen facets of his character which Kikyou would very much like to involve herself with. Kagome had seen him in his best and worst which she never had. If the jewel hadn't come into being…maybe she still could enrapture his heart. Someday…maybe…in the next birth she would gain Inuyasha. For now…she only had to drag along her lifeless body, imbue it with purpose and hate. That would give her strength and fuel her cause. Kikyou stirred from her seat. She found no point in staying any further. She got up and gave the scar on the Goshinboku a final stroke. She plucked out her name flower which was growing nearby and tenderly placed it on the bough of the tree.

"Inuyasha, I'm sorry. But it has to be that way. Maybe we will meet again in the next birth and I promise I'll never let you go. I'll swallow my pride and my ego to become yours. Goshinboku...you are the witness of our love and hate. Convey my feelings to Inuyasha. Let him realize my true intentions." Kikyou whispered as she gazed glassily at the tree. She collected her weapons and began walking away with slow heavy steps. She knew that the flower would not last long. It would wilt in this heat. But if the Sacred Tree willed it...it could freeze time itself until Inuyasha came there. The soul collectors followed her wordlessly, glowing dully in the afternoon sun. She tread through the small natural path toward a clearing and froze. There he was. She glimpsed his red robe emerging from the Bone Eaters Well. She watched him from her concealment, as he shrugged himself like a dog. His ears twitched, detecting sounds in the atmosphere. A few minutes later, the girl popped out with a large yellow backpack on her back. She stretched and said something to the hanyou to which he turned around and yelled some reply. Kikyou smiled bitterly. The girl came near him and struck up a conversation. But Inuyasha wasn't listening. He stiffened suddenly and his ears stopped twitching. He sniffed the air suspiciously. Kikyou shifted uneasily. Given his sharp sense of smell, he might have detected her scent. For a moment she wondered whether he would come bounding toward her, calling her name. Kagome's face would fall and she would as usual, stomp home upset. But what kind of sadistic pleasure would it give her? Would it be the right thing to do? Kikyou shook her head. She was not like that.

Kikyou signaled her soul collectors to wrap themselves around her. The beings did as told and carried her upward and into the clouds. She pulled her hair loose and gazed down at the couple as her hair billowed around her. Inuyasha seemed confused. Kagome tugged his arm and pulled him through the forest way.

"After all, she is my own reincarnation." Kikyou put in thoughtfully as she disappeared into the clouds.

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That night, Inuyasha wandered through the forest. He was sure he had picked her scent but it had dissipated so suddenly that he had to pretend that he had lost his sense of direction. He went up to the Goshinboku and jumped up into its branches. At that point, the familiar scent hit his nostrils, knocking the wind out of him. He nearly lost his footing on the branch, but steadied himself in time. He looked carefully at the object placed on the lower branch. He picked the object and gazed at it fixedly.

"She was here…" He murmured clutching the dew sodden Kikyou flower, still fresh despite the weather.

He looked around carefully, in case anyone was watching and quietly pocketed the flower in his haori, nestling it close to his heart.

"Kikyou…" He ruminated as he settled back on the branch, arms tucked under his head gazing blankly at the stars in the distance as the crickets chirped and the little village lights flickered far away.

The Goshiboku rustled its branches in the breeze indicating that it had kept its promise...

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**A/N: How was it? ^_^  
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**I'm a newbie here and would be glad to make some friends!**

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**And please review my other fics as well! **


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